Showing posts with label terror. Show all posts
Showing posts with label terror. Show all posts

Thursday, 30 September 2010

It's the Final Countdown...

I swear I have given that title to a blog post before. I was so struck with this feeling, that I went through all of the blog posts, and checked their titles. I couldn't SEE one with this title, but I think that I might have just missed it somehow.

The day after tomorrow, I move all of my stuff from Dan's family's house, to my room at Fitz. I am very excited about my new room, but that's about all I am excited about, regarding the next year. I realise that I waxed hysterical about this in my last blog post, but it is all I am really thinking about at the moment.

You know that time, every year (usually around August, September, just as the leaves begin to change colour slightly, and the air gets its first chill), when you start to think about the academic year to come? I certainly do anyway. Every year, it is the same, as I vow that it will be different. I promise myself that this year, I will finally be popular (my 13 year old self was absolutely blind to the fact that she was a very popular little girl), or that this year I will read more books relating to my studies, or that this year I will wear my hair in more interesting ways... It always seems to fall apart by the second or third day of term, where I glumly scold myself that of course I can't change who I am. I am doomed to be this way forever. But I never learn.

I suppose that normal people have this feeling around January the third, but not me. I seem to work by academic years. I suppose, given my career choice, I always will. I have a crystal clear image of myself, aged thirty, writing names into a mark book, and thinking, "This year, I will get all of my marking done on time, and I will colour code my comments on the kids' work, and I will make sure that I use more powerpoint (if it isn't obsolete by then), and I will read more books..."

So what am I thinking this year? What are my proposed (ridiculously far-fetched) self-improvements this year? My 'New Year's Resolutions' if you will?

  • Don't spend as much time on the internet
  • Read more (replace useless internet time with useFUL reading time)
  • Work in the library
  • Get my essays done before 'essay crisis night'
  • Cook for everyone and make them think I am a superawesome cook
  • Pluck my goddamn eyebrows more often.
  • File my work more neatly
  • Go to more lectures
  • Make better lecture notes.
  • Do more exercise
  • Eat more healthily

I am le tired.