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Monday, 10 March 2008

Melancholy

I haven't had the best weekend, to be honest. On Saturday I was meant to be getting my contact lenses, but the Optician had only ordered one eye, so I have to go back next week. I am especially gutted because I am in a charity fashion show on Wednesday, and I am not only the shortest in my group, but I am also the only one in the whole show who wears glasses. I am choreographing one of the Labels, Reiss with my friend Hannah, who is gorgeously tall, skinny, and quirky looking. So I am feeling a little under par there.

Then on Sunday I had an Oboe nightmare. I don't really want to go into it. it was just horrible and degrading.

For some reason, I have this abition to conquer the internet, one site at a time. I have created a youtube account, and I have myspace and facebook. I hate bebo, and I want to delete my bebo account.

I think it has something to do with my fear of being forgotten. I guess I sort of want to be famous. But not in an 'it-girl' sort of way. In an ideal world I would love to be a comedian. But I hate the way that all women who are comedians have to put up with the 'female comedienne' label. why can't you just be a comedian who happens to be a woman? why does it have to be such a big deal that you are a woman comedian? you never get "ooohhhh gosh, it is a male comedian!", do you? So I would love to be a comedienne, amongst other things. At some point, when I have a bit more time, I shall make a list of all of my ambitions. When I am feelinga bit more positive about myeslf, and my ability to achieve them!

I found an excellent blog the other day. But i can't rememeber the URL. I am gutted!!!

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