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Thursday, 25 December 2008

Another Long Blog.

Every now and again, I get an urge to write in this blog. Some might say more often than is really socially acceptable, but then nobody reads this blog anyway. Once I realise that, I usually lose my impetus. But never mind.

Today has been Christmas. Even though technically it is Boxing Day as I write this, it has been Christmas today, as far as I am concerned. This Christmas has been a sparse and frugal one. We couldn't afford a tree, or presents, so we had a table cloth with a tree on it, which we hung from one of our bookshelves, and all of our presents were either home made, or from charity shops. Mum made me two pairs of pyjama bottoms, a hot water bottle and cover, and a dressing gown. Andrew got me a book about religion from a charity shop.
I did get a hard drive though, which is REALLLLLY USEFUL! I have a really old computer so, it has absolutely no memory, and I listen to quite a bit of music, which means I need memory space.









Dan got me a couple of books. One by Neil Gaiman, which I have already finished! And also the Alchemist, which is really lovely. Eleanor got me the DVD of a film that I really like called Eagle Vs Shark. It is a film from New Zealand, and it has the guy from Flight of the Conchords in it. (Another comedy which I adore)
That's the cover of the DVD/Poster for the film. I do love it. :) Andrew made me the DVDs of both series of Twin Peaks to take back to Cambridge when I go up.

So, now onto the rest of my holiday... I went to Dan's, and stayed with him and his family. Then Dan and I went to Venice. It was amazing. He took loads of photos. I took some too, but his are better, because he has an amazing camera which lets him take lots of high quality photos. Also, he has a lovely computer and software which allows him to edit them and make them lovely. I am more than a little jealous! :P

We spent hours and hours wandering the little lanes, passages, and bridges of Venice. We drank coffee in numerous little bars, and we did the usual touristy things, like going to St Mark's Basilica, and the Accademia. The hotel was nice, and we had some lovely food of course. I was expecting Dan to be able
to speak some Italian, being half Italian himself... but alas, he was somewhat linguistically challenged. Plus I kept speaking french, which was a bit of a problem.

Then when we returned from lovely Venice, it was my birthday! I am now 19. Crazy... I don't FEEL nineteen, but apparently I was born over nineteen years ago now. So yeah. Weird. I spent my birthday at Dan's, and we made an amazing brownie. The recipe is as follows:

  1. Look in cupboard and find a brick of year-old muscavado sugar, which miraculously weighs exactly 200g.
  2. Add this to 200g of melted butter, and stir a lot. A LOT.
  3. Add the remnants (about half) of a tin
    of golden syrup. You know you have some in your cupboard. Everyone does. Keep stirring.
  4. Melt an entire massive slab of Dairy Milk chocolate in the microwave, or in a bowl on top of hot water. Pour this into the mix. You should now have a bowl of brown, sticky gloop.
  5. Pour 200g of plain flour into the concoction. Do this bit by bit, to avoid having to deal with a massive flour explosion and a really dry bowl of gloopy flour.
  6. Break a couple of eggs in, and keep mixing.
  7. Pour messily into a brownie tin, and bake until you are bored.
  8. Take out the brownie and enjoy its unhealthy wonderment.
So, Dan got me some scarves, a ridiculously cute teddy bear, and a bracelet. And he took me out to eat at a Japanese restaurant in Cambridge. I will talk more about Japanese stuff in a minute. This appears to be turning into rather a mammoth blog.

The day after my birthday (The 22nd of December), Dan and I drove back to Brighton for my birthday meal with all of my Brighton friends. It was really good to see people again. Dan seemed to get on with everyone really well, a
nd Kim said that Dan and I were really cute together. Kat said that we were "unbelievably cute" too actually. I got some really thoughtful and nice presents from my friends, which made me very happy indeed. After the meal, Dan, Patrick, Tilly and I went to the pub for cider.

The week before we went to Venice, Dan and James came to Brighton and visited. That was so much fun! We went to the pier, and we went to the pub for lunch. Then we had a race back to Cambridge in their cars. They made me feel much better because that morning I had received the news that my cat had died. :(

On the 27th of December, I am off up to Dan's again, and he is giving me a lift to Stanstead airport the next day, (The 28th) so that I can g
o to visit my Dad, in France. I am going to miss Dan so much. But on the 27th, I am meeting his grandparents and his cousins and his aunt. I am nervous of the cousins most of all, because they are the same age as me, and I am scared of being judged!

On the 3rd of January, I am going to visit Laura in Luxembourg, and then on the 5th, we are going to Paris with the T.O.D.S plus a couple of others. This means ten days without Dan. The thought seems unbearable. I am tr
ying not to dwell on it.

Here instead is a picture of me and Emma, from the Winter Ball in Cambridge:

Tuesday, 11 November 2008

A Thousand (nearly) Things.

Oh Lor'.

I have a trillion billion things rushing around my head but none of them seem to make enough sense for me to commit them to paper, whether in my essay, or on other random scraps which I might happen to write.

It is quarter to three, and I ought to be about half way through an essay by now, but I am so not. It is really quite upsetting actually. The essay is meant to be about Plato's Phaedrus, and his attitude towards Sophistry and Dialectic in this dialogue. But at the moment, I can't even get my syntax right in this blog, let alone in an essay.

The thing is, the essay is due in on Thursday. Thursday!? You might be saying. But that would give you the whole of today and tomorrow night to do it. But no. Tomorrow I have to go back to Brighton. Don't get me wrong, I am excited to see Eleanor, but this does mean I am losing out on a LOT of vital time which I need to write my essay. And Eleanor SO won't understand my need to get this essay in on time.

All I am hoping for is that Dan manages to get another ticket to the Caius Super Formal Hall on Thursday evening, because that would actually give me something to look forward to. I suppose I do have the T.O.D.S. meeting to look forward to on Thursday after my supervision. T.O.D.S. is a society a few of my friends and I formed. It is the Tea Or Death Society and our main aim is to consume every type of tea which we can get our hands on in the local tea emporium. We have other aims, but this is by far the principal aim.

Pleasepleasepleaseplease let Dan get another ticket to the Formal. This is basically what is getting me through my week. On Friday, I have to go back to Brighton AGAIN, for our school Prizegiving ceremony. I got the music prize which I am hoping beyond hope is moneys, but I have a sneaking suspicion it is book tokens. Which wouldn't go amiss, but aren't as good as CASH! haha!

It will be really nice to see some of my friends again, but I am not really looking forward to certain members of staff going "I always knew you could do it" and expecting me to tactically forget that they told me not to even bother applying to Cambridge at all... Such is the hypocrisy of the world. I bought a University scarf today, even though this week is going to be bloody expensive.

This has been a somewhat depressing post, but there is this thing at Cambridge (I think that those at the Other Place have it too) called "5th Week Blues" which I and all of my friends seem to be experiencing at the moment. To combat our misery, we murdered a piece of toast, and drowned it in washing up liquid, before leaving it on the kitchen floor like vandals. Because that was a really good use of our time. As is this...

Don't get me wrong. I am having a fantastic time here.

This week just passed has been one of the best weeks ever. The election of Barack Obama was amazing. We all partied all night long at the Union, and when Obama's election was announced, the place just ERUPTED in this Bacchic, ecstatic, euphoria, people kissing, embracing, cheering, laughing, waking the sleeping few to tell them the news... I will remember that night forever. And I have met Dan...

I have never felt so at home before. I have met some amazing, wonderful, beautiful, intelligent, hilarious, likeminded people. I truly believe that I am at home here. But right now, I feel like death.

I think that the only thing is to go to bed. And post a much more optimistic post at the weekend, when this hellish week is over. Because inevitably, whatever happens this week, there will (hopefully) be another week after it.

Sunday, 19 October 2008

What do I want to be?

Have been told that I already AM all of the things that I wish I could be but that I just can't see it. Obviously, I think people are wrong. But I spend so much of my time wanting to be things, or wanting to be a certain way. I also find it incredibly difficult to decipher what I AM... What makes a person THEM? Some people seem to be so sure about who they are and what they stand for. I don't think that it is that straightforward.

Things I want to be... now, and in the near future.
  • A member of the College Chapel Choir. [Check]
  • An illustrator for The Cambridge Student. [Sort of Check, although haven't actually started yet, and I want it to be part of my identity]
  • Beautiful. I know it is all subjective... but I do wish I were beautiful.
  • Funny. I do a lot for laughs, because it makes me feel like ME and I don't often get a "me" feeling.
  • Musical. And known for it.
  • Liked. [check. I think. I have such a desire to be someone whom people can turn to, and also who can be laughed with and so on.]
  • A legend. Ha, how egocentric. (at least I am honest)
  • Someone with Youtube fame. [Check....ish. One of my videos has around 31,000 views, but I am always hungering for more celebrity. How tragic. Oh well. here is the link... CLICK! ]
  • Someone with style. I love wearing clothes. I love making outfits up in my head, and searching for all of the items. Gosh, this blog is so ME ME ME. But yeah...
  • Clever. I am never going to be the best at being clever. Because I am at Cambridge, and there are so many people here who are incredible. But I would like to get a good degree pleeeeease!!
  • creative [check. i suppose. I always paint, draw, sew, knit, make, etc etc.]

So there we go. Another list one. But nobody really reads this Blog anyway. I would be really interested to know if you HAVE read one of my posts, so please comment if you have. I do like to know if I have an audience. :)

I suppose before I end this, I might make a short, and rather incoherent list of things I want from the future...

  • A family. Yes, I want to be a mother.
  • A home. Yes, I would absolutely revel in making a home glorious, and beautiful, full of art, and music and happiness.
  • Fame. I have a problem in that I can't bear the thought of leaving this world without having left something of note behind me, so that I can be remembered forever...
  • To be beautiful. I don't know why looks are so important to me... I don't care about other people's! And to look at me, you wouldn't think I cared about my own. To some degree I don't, as I know there is no hope...

So... Yeah.

Wednesday, 15 October 2008

Cambridge!

Well, here I am in Cambridge...

I have been here for a week, and a bit. So much has already happened. It is actually ridiculous! I have eaten my weight in cheese toasties. Toasties seem to be the "in" thing here. That, or I am just unaccustomed to the mysterious nuances of student life.

Tonight I am going to something called a 'College Family Superhall' which is indeed as weird and confusing as it sounds. It is basically a fancy dress dinner. I have also joined a society which simply calls itself the 'Sheila and Her Dog Society'. I must say, the people are the strangest and cutest people I have ever met in my life. They sit around in their dressing gowns, playing Charades, and eating lumps of cheese. It is all rather quaint, but yet so lively! I have also auditioned and been accepted by the College Chapel Choir, which aside from the God stuff (which I will be getting enough of during my Theology course for the next three years), should be really good fun! And it means free food on Sundays!

I am still considering whether or not to get into rowing... Do I really want to be a boatie? Do I need that in my life? I am not sure... But it is something so inherently 'Cambridge', you know?

Have made some lovely friends here too, which I am very happy about.

Sorry this is such a quick post. Here is a picture of some of us on Matriculation day. (Laura, Emma, and Me)

Monday, 22 September 2008

The Summer.

Well, this erratic blogger is currently in Australia!

The summer has been... eventful, to say the least! I did my exams. Some were harder than others, and that showed in my results. But all in all, I got three As! Hurrah! I am going to Cambridge!

I went to Italy with my Orchestra for a week, and we also played in exotic Birmingham.



I also went to France to see my Dad and I spent two weeks there. It seemed to fly by to be honest. My sister was on her way to taking her first steps, and my brother was... cheeky as ever! I went on bicycle rides in rural France, and did all sorts of picturesque French things...

So, results day was emotional, and the day after, even more so.

I did manage to watch a film called 'Penelope' though, which I can't work out. Is it a new film? Has it been out for a while? Christina Ricci looked really young, but Reese Witherspoon looked the way she looks now... Anyway, it was a lovely whimsical film, and it had James McAvoy in it, which I would never complain about. I also made friends with a lovely woman, whose name I forget. I don't think I will ever forget her though. It wasn't as though she was particularly remarkable, but we had a bit in common, and she was very friendly. We both wept when we saw the Australian sunrise from the aeroplane window...

Since I have been here, I have swam with sea turtles on the Coral Ree
f in Queensland, walked over the Harbour Bridge in Sydney, seen the chimney in Port Kembla, touched various animals, got a new watch, got some sunburn, broken a lamp, and cut my foot, and eaten a LOT of Thai food!


So, I am home in a week, safely in the arms of my loved ones. But I am also, orphaned in my own country. My mother has just flown out to Australia for at least ten weeks, and my Dad has moved to France...

But I suppose I am going to Cambridge, so I shouldn't complain! I don't know what to expect! I am so excited but so... nervous. Stepping into the unknown! Gosh.

Well, here ends another post from possibly the most irregular blogger ever...

Wednesday, 4 June 2008

Procrastination.

Although I have a french exam tomorrow, a three hour long exam encompassing every piece of literature ever written about the Great War on Friday morning, and another exam on Friday afternoon, on the Old Testament, I am still procrastinating. This worries me greatly, it really does... But for some reason, finding artwork for every single song on my iTunes library seems like a priority at the moment. As does updating a blog that nobody reads, at 1 in the morning, the night before an exam en francais...

Alors, what has been on my mind most of all today (aside from my hideous inability to focus my mind on revision) are my plans for when these wretched exams are actually over. Here is how my summer looks at the moment:

June 19th: Last two exams! at 3 O clock, I will be free!!
June 20th-21st: A trip to Stratford to see some Shakespeare plays, as a little end of exams treat! A group of us are going, and staying in a B&B.
June 23rd: My friend Tasha is having her birthday party. It is a fancy dress affair, and I love to dress up. So I had better get cracking with my idea... SO EXCITING!
June 25th: My french group are going out for lunch with our teachers. Yay!
June 27th: The official school leavers' day, and the Ball! I have my dress for that already but i need to get it altered slightly, because it is slightly too long.
June 28th: Another party! I have a feeling this one might be quite exciting, because the girl's parents are mailing out the invitations...! Also, this is the day my Dad, Brother, Sister, and stepmum all move to France for ever. :(
June 30th-ish: My Grade 8 Oboe exam... and I thought the exams were over... I am so nervous about this one. today I did a hardcore oboe practice session, spending an hour on ONE Bach Study... :(
July 3rd-12th: Orchestra stuff! I will be on tour in Italy, and then home to do the final concert, and then up to Birmingham for the Music for Youth festival...
August 6th: It is my friend Eleanor's birthday. I have been at every single one of her birthdays for the last nine years, I think! Imagine that!
August 14th: RESULTS DAY. OH MY GOSH. I don't want to spend the whole of the previous evening checking the UCAS website to see if they have updated it telling me if I got my place at Cambridge, or not.
August 15th-(September 28th): I am going to Australia to visit my family! I haven't seen them since I was fourteen... Which is quite a while considering how much growing and changing as a person you do, between the ages of fourteen and eighteen.

So that is my summer... I hope it all goes to plan. I really do. The only other thing keeping me going through these exams, and the guilt at having not sufficiently prepared, is the thought of all of the craft activities I am going to undertake as soon as my exams are over. And the novels I shall read! I am planning to read the second book in The Cornish Trilogy. And I have been recommended 'The Master And Margarita', which was originally in Russian. I might read it, or I might not, depending upon how heavy going it is, and how frazzled my poor brain is! I want to knit a long long scarf! And I want to make a menagerie of felt animals, and a bag for myself, and a skirt...

Oh and here is the link to this woman's photos:

PaperNest

She gave me the idea of making heart shaped rainbow crayons.

And on that note, sleep beckons...

Tuesday, 3 June 2008

EXAMS!

Oh My Gosh.

At the moment, I am definitely the most stressed I have been in a long time. I haven't sent any posts for a while, because I have been so busy with my school work and things like that.

I did find time to go on a music camp though. I know, I know... band camp, and all of that... but it was actually really fun. What is odd about it though is that it is surrounded by this kind of enigma. I can't quite put my finger on it, but all of the people who run it seem to be interlinked in ways I don't understand. It is held in the grounds of this farmhouse owned by some people who just... invite a bunch of people to stay there and make music in their barn. It all sounds rather suspect to me, but it is an opportunity to eat cake twice a day and play my oboe for seven hours at at time, so I'm not complaining.

We played Elgar's Cockaigne Overture, and Sibelius;' Symphony 1. They are both wonderful pieces of music. I love Elgar with a PASSION, and the Sibelius can obly really be described as sublime.

Here are some pictures from Camp:
The top picture is of me and my friend Claire. Underneath that is a picture of the oboe section! hurrah! And the one jsut above here ^ is of the whole orchestra!!

I found an amazing person today, on Flickr. Yes, I have a flickr account too... This person's username thing is PaperNest, and I really recommend you check her stuff out. She takes lovely pictures of pretty things, and it doesn't feel pretentious at all, like some photography does.

I was going to be all clever and do linkage so you could look at her stuff, but my computer is being weird. maybe next time.

Monday, 10 March 2008

Melancholy

I haven't had the best weekend, to be honest. On Saturday I was meant to be getting my contact lenses, but the Optician had only ordered one eye, so I have to go back next week. I am especially gutted because I am in a charity fashion show on Wednesday, and I am not only the shortest in my group, but I am also the only one in the whole show who wears glasses. I am choreographing one of the Labels, Reiss with my friend Hannah, who is gorgeously tall, skinny, and quirky looking. So I am feeling a little under par there.

Then on Sunday I had an Oboe nightmare. I don't really want to go into it. it was just horrible and degrading.

For some reason, I have this abition to conquer the internet, one site at a time. I have created a youtube account, and I have myspace and facebook. I hate bebo, and I want to delete my bebo account.

I think it has something to do with my fear of being forgotten. I guess I sort of want to be famous. But not in an 'it-girl' sort of way. In an ideal world I would love to be a comedian. But I hate the way that all women who are comedians have to put up with the 'female comedienne' label. why can't you just be a comedian who happens to be a woman? why does it have to be such a big deal that you are a woman comedian? you never get "ooohhhh gosh, it is a male comedian!", do you? So I would love to be a comedienne, amongst other things. At some point, when I have a bit more time, I shall make a list of all of my ambitions. When I am feelinga bit more positive about myeslf, and my ability to achieve them!

I found an excellent blog the other day. But i can't rememeber the URL. I am gutted!!!

Saturday, 1 March 2008

Gigging!

Well well well!

Just got back from seeing Reel Big Fish with Kim and Tash, and their siblings! I can safely say it was the best gig i have ever been to. the atmostphere was incredible, I was in the mosh pit for a while, and then someone whacked my rook piercing, and it started to bleed, so I went further back. (Yeah I am a sissy...) to be honest, the whole gig was a huge great big skanking session. If you don't know what skanking is, either go to a Ska gig, or look here!!! Unfortunately there was a huge man who decided to take his shirt off and sweat on everyone, but apart from that it was absolutely mind bogglingly incredible!!! Of course there were some Kodak moments:
and for everyone's benefit, a picture of Reel Big Fish:

They played lots of covers, such as Take On Me, and Sweet Child Of Mine. :))))) Anyway, i shall stop raving about them now! Other than that, there hasn't been much going on. I have been roped into being in a charity fashion show. I am going to be wearing an *ahem* lovely... baby pink prom dress. Hmm... That isn't really my style.

I have also learned a new term: "Theistic Evolutionist". To be a theistic evolutionist, you must believe in God, and also evolution at once. I presume that most religious people in the western world are theistic evolutionists?

that is enough for now. Herbal Tea.

Saturday, 23 February 2008

Half Term

Well, I have succeeded in having a very action packed Half Term week, but not a very productive one, work-wise. Still, it has been fulfilling in other ways. I had my friends Hannah and Nabs over last Sunday to watch the Kenneth Branagh version of Hamlet. He starred in it, and directed it so over all the film seemed to be a big self-indulgent montage of his face. We are studying Hamlet at the moment, and thought we may as well make an evening of it, so Hannah brought shortbread with her, and Nabs brought Schloer (or however you spell it. that drink...)

The Saturday before that, I had a Lord of the Rings evening with Kat and Tilly. We managed to watch all three, but not the bonus features which was a shame. I know, I am the biggest geek in Britain, but I think that a LOTR all-nighter is necessary from time to time. I suppose that now is the best moment to mention that I own a replica of Arwen's Evenstar pendant from the Films. Although it is embarrassing, I am soooo proud of it.

Last night, it was my friend Alison's birthday, which was fun, but on my way back home on the last train I met two drunk schoolteachers, three people about my age, and an old Mod, and we all sat around on the carriage drinking cider out of mugs, and listening to Kings of Leon on one of the schoolteachers' laptops, which was something of a rave!

On Thursday night, I went out for dinner with my Orchestra Chums, and then we were going to go out to a gig, but the band we wanted to see (Blueprint) weren't on until 1 in the morning. We were really gutted cause they are an amazing band, but instead some of us went to the pub.

I also went for a fun day in at my friend Kirsty's house, with some of our other friends. We made cake, and a makeshift cheese platter, which is basically what we do when we are around at her house.

I have also been watching a lot of 'Twin Peaks' with my friend, Elbe. I highly recommend it, as it is such an incredible television programme. Elbe is obsessed by the symmetry of the shots, which I must admit are beautiful, but I am mainly taken by the plot. It is so gloriously creepy! There is a midget who talks backwards, a little boy in a tiny tuxedo who holds creamed corn in his hands, and about a thousand subplots that I BET will all link up in the end!

At the moment, I am listening to 'The Libertine' by Patrick Wolf. It is one of those songs that made the world glow, as I listened to it on my iPod, so I thought I would listen to it again.

Unfortunately, I haven't been able to find anything at all intellectual to write about in this Blog entry, mainly because I have been geeking out this half term. I am still reading 'The Cornish Trilogy' by Robertson Davies, mainly because halfway through the second book, I was suddenly plunged into a seemingly never-ending chasm of work, which I am essentially still lost in. This half term has been a welcome break, although I have done far less work than I ought to have, which has just led to feelings of guilt.

This dress here is incredible! Oh my gosh, I want it! (I hope that link worked, I just spent about Five minutes trying to make it come up properly...)

Anyway, on that note, I end this rather mundane post.

Sunday, 10 February 2008

Women in Islam. And More Stuff.

So, right now, i am meant to be revising for a mock on Islam which i have tomorrow morning. but what i really want to be doing is writing a blog. so i thought i would combine the two, in a pseudo-productive sort of way. So here are some musings on Women within Islam:

Some people argue that before Islam was introduced to Arabia, women had fewer rights, and that men were permitted to commit polygamy an unlimited amount of times, but other theologians and historians believe that it was a much more egalitarian set up, ie there was more equality between the sexes.

Once Islam had been established, so had the roles of men and women in Arabic society, and within the muslim faith. most people agree that women and men have spiritual equality before God, and in religious terms, but where they differ is in the belief that men and women have different roles and responsibilities within society. The role of the man is as a provider and as a head of the family. he has a responsibility towards his wife/wives and his children. on a non-family orientated spectrum, the man's space is in public, whereas the woman's domain is in private. The woman's responsibility is towards raising her children, and beginning their spiritual education. she is financially dependant upon her husband, but he is dependant upon her for his wellbeing and comfort.

Unfortunately, i must cut this blog short, as i can barely keep my eyes open. but on a more vain note, i want my hair cut like this:

Alexa Chung is just too pretty.

Saturday, 2 February 2008

Things In List Format.

well, i haven't blogged for a while, mainly because i sort of failed to see the point. but here is a list of things which have been on my mind recently:

  • Cambridge University.
  • Getting the Grades.
  • Neck scarves made of silk.
  • Red hair
  • Shirts
  • Shorts
  • The 'Nautical' Look.
  • A band called Vampire Weekend
  • Colourful Tights
  • The Smiths
  • Cheese
  • Turtles
  • Sore Throats
  • Stress
  • Sylvia Plath
  • Hamlet
  • Trench Poetry
  • The Apocalypse
  • The Nature of Celebrity
  • Australia
  • My Family (not the television show, the actual people I'm related to!)
  • The Summer
  • Aeroplanes
  • Turkish Rose
  • Perfume
  • Vanity
  • "Rah Rah Rah!"
  • Glitter
  • Dreams
  • Fountain Pens
  • The 1990s
  • Colour
  • Vodka and Cranberry
  • France
  • Change
  • Twin Peaks
  • Cheese and Crisp Baguettes
  • Soup and Bread for lunch
  • Old Books
  • Sushi
  • Exercise
  • Individuality. (does it even exist?)
so there is a nice list. if anyone reads this, can they reply with a list?

Thursday, 17 January 2008

Cambridge!

Well, I had to go back to Cambridge because I got pooled. So I had interviews at Fitzwilliam, and New Hall, and I got an AAA offer from Fitz! So now it is all go on the studying front.

I have decided to try to stay on top of my work, and do at least ONE piece extra a week. This is proving to be a lot of hard work, and at the moment, I am not getting on with my teachers very well. I don't know why, but none of them seem to like me. This has become the bane of my life, and I have found myself scared to talk in lessons because I am scared to be condemned.

Things I am angry about:
  • "Booty Luv" - I don't know what this is? what does it MEAN!? the whole concept worries and upsets me. I think it is a band name?
  • Talent not being recognised. And equally, people who don't have talent, getting the big breaks in life.
  • Not having money.
  • The idea of a celebrity "endorsing" something, and the way everyone goes MAD for that something. For example, Kate Moss has a perfume range out, and people are buying it because it is Kate Moss. Having said that, I bet I will like it, when I smell it.
  • Internet Illiteracy. Someone said to me today that "Adults are the immigrants, and Children are the natives [in today's society]" and perhaps that is the case. But ignorance makes me cross.
  • People who say "Elgar is all about patriotism." If you have heard his THIRD SYMPHONY (although he only wrote the sketches for this, and it was completed by some other guy) then you would think otherwise. It is PURE sex, in musical form. There is this AMAZING violin motif at the beginning of one of the movements... och!
I don't really know why I still keep this blog. I know nobody reads it. I don't know why I would WANT anyone to either though. Just a thought.

I have begun a dream diary. I usually have these really epic dreams. They often involve places from my youth, and inventions. I love them, they are really interesting, and I especially like it when things make total sense in the dream, but when you wake up, and re-think, it is totally random! Anyway, since I have been keeping this diary, I have only been able to remember fragments of my dreams. It's better than nothing though, and at least they are fragments I can always remember now.

I never ended up seeing 'Les Chansons D'Amour', but I still really want to. My legendary friend Vita says it is "really weird, with loads of lesbians..." HA!

It has just occurred to me that I am really not pretty enough to model. I have never wanted to, but I really wish that I was one of those people who was off-beat in a sexy way. Or a style icon, or really beautiful. I know a few people like that, particularly Hannah, and Becca. And I need to sort out my arm flab...

Gosh this has been such a negative post. I promise a more positive one soon!

Wednesday, 2 January 2008

Romance

Salut toutlemonde!

Well, I am desperately trying to complete two french essays before i go out tonight to see a french film: Les Chansons D'Amour . I am really excited about seeing this film, as it has one of my favourite actresses in it (Ludivine Sagnier), and it is a musical!!! So all in all, i am having a bit of a french themed day. I just wish i hadn't left ALL of my homework until after New Year... and internet procrastination is my downfall.

On the subject of new year, I had a good one in the end, although theings were looking rough at one point. I was meant to be spending it in the village/town where my dad lives, with him, and my baby brother and sister. But I was getting more and more stressed out with the children, and with my life-plans (to convert to Judaism, marry a Hindu, and bring up several delightfully mixed race children) being shot to pieces by well meaning family friends, that I eventually upped and left, getting the first train I could to an even more remote village, where I was invited to a party at my friend Tasha's house. It was a really funny night, with some top quotes to enter into my Quote Book.
We weren't wearing hats for the entire evening, but they did come into the party equation for some reason. nobody really remembers why!

Christmas was good. I split my time between mother's and father's. (Oh the joys of divorce!) and of course received some pretty good presents. Lots of makeup, and some clothes, which is really what I wanted, so was pleased on that front. However, I did have to eat TWO christmas dinners, due to both parents insisting on being the one who cooked me my christmas meal... Neither of them know that the other one did, and I suppose I intend to keep it that way!

I have been discovering other people's blogs too, which has made me feel a bit like my blog isn't all that good! It doesn't really have a point to it, and I don't think anyone reads it!

So, back to my french essay on «Les éffets des progrès en génétique». I shall post a blog about Les Chansons D'Amour at some point. I really hope it is good!
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